Love
Written by Jeff Howell | Associate Pastor of Administration
Dear Faith Family ~
Cars need oil. Joints need cartilage, synovial fluid, and bursae. The components inside of nuclear reactors need varnish coatings. Otherwise, friction will surely occur and will create serious or even irreparable damage. Relationships also need generous doses of something to operate correctly: love.
At a wedding where a couple is starting out on a new life together, we would expect to hear 1 Cor 13:4—7: “[4] Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant [5] or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; [6] it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. [7] Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” Indeed, these words are fitting at a wedding, but did you know that they were originally written by the Apostle Paul to address a different matter altogether?
In 1 Cor 13, we find a strong admonition on the proper use of spiritual gifts in the Corinthian church. The believers in Corinth were exercising their showy gifts in a spirit of rivalry and one-upmanship. To that proud and sinful practice, Paul responded in vv. 1—3 with a stinging truth that anything done without love leads to zero gain. Indeed, if we as believers in Christ are to do things that matter for good and will reflect the character of our risen Savior, they must be done with the kind of love that is described in vv. 4—7. THIS is the love that believers should employ in EVERY relational setting.
In any relationship, we at times must deal with the unloveliness of others; but sometimes, the unloveliness is the product of our own hearts. Keeping in mind Paul’s words to the Corinthians about their need to love, I’d like to offer a few thoughts on 1 Cor 13:4—7 as a reminder for us to cultivate Christ’s love in our own lives and relationships.
First, a question. Have you considered signing up to run the Boston Marathon on April 21, 2025? I have. Every day from now until race day, I could plan to read books on pre-race nutrition and day-of fueling strategies. I could watch videos on proper running techniques. I could pour over blogs that will point me to the best shoes and equipment. Also, I could listen to podcasts from running experts and past marathon champions to learn all the tricks. And on race day, guess what? I would be the best-educated loser in the field. Why? Because marathons are not just a subject about which to learn, they are something that demands action! In all my preparation, I failed to run a single step.
Review the text of 1 Cor 13:4—7 above and note how love is depicted as an action. Love is…15 deliberate, active practices. Love is also kind of like a garden. Gardens require intentional thought and attentive upkeep. Well-tended gardens produce a harvest of good things, while forsaken gardens produce little that anybody enjoys. If we consider Paul’s instruction in 1 Cor 13:4—7 through this lens, we easily find Good Fruit to Grow (v. 4a), Dangerous Weeds to Uproot (v. 4b—6a), and Healthy Soil to Prepare (v. 6b—7).
Good Fruit to Grow (v. 4a)
– Paul describes true Christ-like love as being marked by patience and kindness. Did you know that these qualities are partners that work together? Patience means having a long fuse that does not react unlovingly to provocation. Instead, the proper, loving reaction occurs when patience’s partner, kindness, is employed. A kind love responds to ill treatment with goodness and graciousness. No explosive exclamations, regrettable rage, unbiblical ultimatums, or wounding words. Those things are not of the Spirit, Who rather has been given to us as the Spirit of “power and love and self-control” (2 Tim 1:7b).
Dangerous Weeds to Uproot (vv. 4b—6)
– We must acknowledge that there are ugly things we can allow into the garden which will choke out our good fruit. These dangerous weeds are things that genuine Christian love does NOT do.
Biblical love does not boil over with envy, meaning it does not lust after what another has such that it wishes the other person would be deprived of it. Instead, a believer’s love is happy for the other person to be able to experience the blessing!
Biblical love does not boast or brag. Consider this rule of thumb: If I must tell other people just how great I am, I’m probably not as great as I think I am. Consider this also…the idea behind the Greek word from which we get “boast,” means “to be a windbag.”[1] Little wonder that Paul next calls out the weed of arrogance (v. 4c) which means to have an inflated sense of one’s own importance. Is this love? It is not.
Rudeness (v. 5a) has the idea of behaving indecently, disgracefully, dishonorably, or in a shameful manner. Seeking one’s own way (v. 5b), begs a question: How can I look out for the interests of others (Phil 2:4), if I’m only looking out for myself? And what about the weed of being irritable or easy to anger (v. 5c)? While there is a time and a place for righteous anger (cf. Eph 4:26), getting testy or even indignant when our rights are infringed upon is not the love of Jesus. The weed of irritability cannot coexist with the fruit of patience.
Being resentful (v. 5d)—or in the words of other Bible translations, “taking into account a wrong suffered”—is the weed of harboring injury which is a choice to prolong a hurt and which helps nobody involved to find healing or to grow in Christ. And lastly, rejoicing in wrongdoing or unrighteousness (v. 6) is that lack of love which takes perverse delight in evil or the fall of another, even an opponent. No, the believer’s love should rejoice in truth, and biblical love cannot rejoice when truth is denied.
So, love is like a garden in which we diligently need to uproot dangerous weeds so that we can cultivate good fruit. If we want to be faithful in all of this, how do we prepare & maintain the kind of heart soil that is the most favorable for fruit and the most inhospitable to weeds?
Healthy Soil to Prepare (v. 7)
– “Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” To have any success in bearing, believing, hoping, and enduring all things, we must maintain the correct daily focus, which itself must be rooted in the correct future focus.
“Bearing” has the idea of supporting like a roof or putting up with something. The focus is on daily life—today’s easy things and hard things. But, believing and hoping look to something far greater than what is happening today! We can believe the best because biblical love has faith that God can & will work in every situation. Similarly, we can have hope because of the resources and unchanging character of our sovereign, eternal God. These surpassing truths enable believers to have a love that can endure all things today. The believer’s here & now love is not rooted in earthly resources but in God’s eternal promises. Maintaining this focus, dear family, is the healthy heart soil that will enable and motivate us to truly love!
Here’s a prayer that knits together everything Paul has described about love in 1 Cor 13:4—7:
Lord, help me to exercise a genuine love that is slow & controlled in response; a love that seeks to pour out mercy, which I need to remember is always undeserved; a love which is happy for others’ successes and speaks only what will build others up; a love which considers others as more important than “itself;” a love that is modest & tactful, looking out for the best interests of others; a love that chooses not to be provoked and does not hold sinful grudges; a love that finds no delight in evil or another’s misfortune but rejoices in truth; a love that puts up & perseveres with whatever circumstance may come, because it is so convinced that faith will be made sight and hope will be fulfilled and because You are God. Help me to exercise the kind of love that never fails because it comes from You, Father, was modeled by Your Son for my instruction, and is enabled in me by Your Holy Spirit. Amen.
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So, we as believers indeed are in a marathon that will play out for the rest of our earthly lives. Let us take the steps to exercise biblical love by cultivating good fruit, uprooting bad weeds, and maintaining the right heart soil. And when this month is over and the next one comes and everyone wants to focus on “love” and cinnamon hearts and cupids, you will already be leading the pack as you exercise true, biblical, friction-eliminating, relationship-blessing, Christ-like love.
In His love,
[1] Cleon L. Rogers Jr. & Cleon L. Rogers III, The New Linguistic and Exegetical Key to the Greek New Testament (Grand Rapids, Mich.: Zondervan Publishing House, 1998), 380.